Diagnosing Depressives in Popular Film
Mr. Miyagi (in Karate Kid II)
Overview: In the original Karate Kid, Mr. Miyagi was a great role model for Daniel-”son,” really funny, mellow, and fun to be around, despite the at-the-time confusing and seemingly extreme Nazi-esque “wax on/wax off” regiment; but in its sequel (part 2 of 3 in a rather tepid “trilogy”), he majorly freaks out—in, of all places, Japan—dealing with unresolved grievances in his hometown, trouble with his immediate family, and stirred up emotions regarding his deceased wife. He’s a real emotional tampon in this movie, but has accrued major “empathy collateral” from the first movie, so the viewer gives Mr. Miyagi a pass. We’re like “okay, you obviously got some issues to deal with, but please, you better return to being chill in KK III, if they even make one,” which, unfortunately, they did.
Diagnosis: Bipolar disorder.
Suggested Medication: Lithium, psychotherapy.
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It’s unfortunate, but we’re creatures of habit and we’ll hold onto our convictions until we’re literally forced to stop.
You basically have to walk a perfect straight line at all times in Japan because if you veer off at any moment you will almost definitely get mashed by a Japanese lady on a mamabike with three kids strapped to it.
Come on people, as if other people’s choices of love affected you in the least. Penguins don’t pull this crap on fellow homosexual penguins.
3. You’ve searched Etsy or eBay for a cute and inexpensive fez.