Assessing Your ‘Type’ Via The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Boys/men will tell you that Leonardo was a leader, and they’ll sound really proud of that, as though Leonardo’s personal achievements collectively belong to everyone born with a penis. But from a dating perspective, he’s mega bossy and standoffish. If you get in a fight, he’ll storm off to seclusion and read a book, and he’ll be annoyingly smug about it. If he doesn’t get his way, he will pout and whine, or worse; he’ll flounce. When the going gets tough, Leonardo gets going. F’real. Wrap it up with this one.
Mike is clearly a stoner. He has a delayed reaction to everything, like a Coinstar machine. He seems like he’d be from the West Coast. He always has the munchies, so he’s a cool boyfriend to have if you like to eat your feelings and such. His ideas are always half-baked, but he’s funny and always has pot so… not much else to say about that.
Donatello is tricky. Initially, I thought he was an overachieving workaholic. If you ask anyone, they’ll say, “Oh, Donatello just LOVES to work!” But I think Donatello is gay. In reality, he doesn’t isolate himself much (Leonardo is more likely to do that), and when he’s working, it takes him like two seconds to complete his tasks because he’s outrageously smart. He’s outgoing and has the same access to women as his brothers. He’s a total catch – so why is he pinned as the “loner”? I’ll tell you why – because he’s not beasting on chicks all day. He also seems to share a close friendship with Michelangelo, whose drug use indicates a liberal leaning on social issues. Donatello also has the purple bandana, but I think the evidence I’ve provided is more telling than something as flip as his bandana color.