Accurate Tourism Slogans For Several European Countries
Disclaimer: Inspired by Josh Gondelman. As such, these would all make terrible tourism slogans.
England: “Presenting Kate Middleton (and her sister’s ass)”
France: “Foux da fa fa”
Germany: “Our sausages are huge”
Belgium: “In Bruges”
Luxembourg: “The best things come in tiny packages”
Spain: “Our goalie is hotter than yours”
Portugal: “Better than Spain”
Italy: “Come see our priapic clown! (But stay for the gelato)”
Czech Republic: “Existential crisis? Apply within”
Denmark: “Lars Von Trier is not a Nazi sympathizer, we swear!”
Greece: “Never pay tax again”
Cyprus: “Two for the price of one!”
Slovenia: “To violent crime: Slovenia says NO! ”
Croatia: “Get ready to party; recover in Dubrovnik”
Romania: “We’re not Communist anymore, plus we have the world’s second largest building in square feet. Beat that”
Bulgaria: “The home of Ken Lee”
Montenegro: “That place James Bond went to once”
Albania: “Feel free to blood feud”
Turkey: “We’ll be part of the EU soon, promise”
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I would rather jump around and sweat my body to a Lady Gaga song. Yoga is so overrated.
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4. When I mentioned my idea of applying for a competitive writing fellowship in addition to graduate programs, and you told me I shouldn’t.
Women want to see you in social situations, outdoors doing manly activities, on a boat holding a fish, ANYTHING that indicates you’ve got a life.